I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
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