Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize
