I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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