Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
