Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
