Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Randomize
