She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
And then he peed in my hair
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