Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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