I bet he comes in French.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
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