he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Green mimosas i think yes
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
