I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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