Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Sober January is a disaster.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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