the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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