i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Randomize
