In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
