the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
it's great music for shaving your balls
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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