I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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