i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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