so explain again why im purple
no
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
