Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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