Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
