So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
