Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
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