I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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