Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
