So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
How naked do you want me to be?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
