wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
