I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
