i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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