I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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