i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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