I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
