I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
