you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
