Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
