I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
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Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Well I just put wine in my tea
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
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When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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