they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
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