I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
