my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
handjob tips. give me some.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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