i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
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my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
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I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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