Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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