You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
