He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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