Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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