Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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