No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
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