i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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