The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
