I want to stick my p in your. b.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Please don't give away my fajitas
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
