i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
