Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
In America we eat man semen.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?