I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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