I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Randomize
